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HEART 2 HEART

Friday, September 03, 2010

I am 20 years old. I got married six months ago and am expecting a baby. Recently, I came to know that my husband’s younger brother, who stays with us, has tested HIV positive. He appears normal outwardly. I am now worried as he shares the bathroom, the utensils and even the furniture with all of us. I fear that something may go wrong with my pregnancy. Kindly help.

HIV cannot be contracted through casual social contact - through utensils, clothes or by using a common bathroom or furniture. It can be transmitted only through genital contact (intercourse, oral sex, anal sex, etc.) or by a blood to blood contact. In your case you don’t have to worry at all about the HIV positive status of your brother-in-law. Your baby is safe. In fact your remaining worried and tense could be more harmful to your pregnancy. HIV/AIDS victims need to be treated with extra care and compassion. They yearn for being accepted and loved. It is only human to feel the pain of those who are suffering and feel empathetic towards them. Your understanding of your brother-in-law will go a long way in these circumstances. It will also help you to mature as a person. Parental disapproval in marriage

I proposed to a girl who immediately reciprocated my feelings, but she fears that her father may not allow her to marry me as he is unpredictable. How do we go ahead in this matter?

You have not specified your age and the girl’s age, so we presume that both of you are of the ‘right age’ to marry, which means that both of you have completed your academic education, well established in your respective careers and are able to financially support yourselves. Marriage is a serious commitment and both the partners must be ‘willing and able’ to shoulder all the responsibilities that come along with it. Therefore if both of you are ‘willing and able’ to take on the responsibility of marriage, then no one should or can come in the way. Of course, it is always better to have the blessings of the family. In this context you could arrange a meeting with her father to seek his blessings after she breaks the news to him. If he gives his consent happily it is good, if not, then both of you must emotionally prepare yourself to face your first major challenge together. Life is full of ups and downs and both of you need to be emotionally equipped to meet all that life doles out to you. Whether both of you can weather storms together successfully will determine the success of your marriage.


 

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