Nocturnal emission
I used to masturbate regularly for two years. But I’ve stopped it for the last two months. Since then I’ve been getting wet dreams. Is there anything wrong with my reproductive system? If so, how do I get myself treated for this ailment?
Wet dreams, nightfall or nocturnal emission of semen, are different names of the same phenomenon, which is perfectly normal.
At the age of 12-13, the testis in boys start producing sperms. At this age, boys start developing sexual attraction towards girls, and start discharging semen during sleep. This discharge is invariably accompanied by sexual dreams. This is a normal, natural, involuntary and uncontrollable response to sexual tension that builds up within the body due to sex hormones. There is no reason to be worried, frightened or feel guilty about a wet dream. It happens with all men and is not a disease. It is completely harmless and has no ill effect on one’s health or manhood. If you do not masturbate, then nightfall is inevitable. One of these two things have to happen.
A normal man produces at least 20,000 sperms every minute; and the same number of old sperms die every minute. With this rate of production (spermatogenesis), one needs an outlet. Either one can ejaculate (through intercourse or masturbation) or else, nightfall which happens naturally.
Neither nightfall is a disease nor masturbation. Both are harmless and physiological.
Inner unrest
I am really very uneasy and disturbed. I started liking this girl in my class since a few months. I think and fantasize about her often. She is single and very beautiful, but she does not respond to me and will be shifting to another town with her family. This is causing me a lot of grief. Also, the atmosphere at my residence is depressing as my parents don’t get along well and fight openly and bitterly. I need someone to love in my life. What should I do?
I can feel the agony in your words. It is clear that you are unhappy with the environment at home and are looking for a ‘home away from home’, which is why you are so emotionally in need of a relationship. It is also very clear that this girl you talk about is not responding to your overtures. Therefore, pursuing her in reality or in fantasy will get you nowhere except ‘down in the dumps’. Let her go. It is now imperative that you create a life for yourself, which will increase your self-worth. ‘Beauty is not skin deep’ – every person is endowed with unique qualities, which need to be fully utilized to make a unique contribution to society.
You are no exception. Therefore, get going and be ‘the best of who you can be’. Educate yourself, identify your talents and get training to exploit them to the maximum, remain socially active by taking some courses, doing some community work and participating in group activities in college and even otherwise. In this way you will increase your self-worth and get out of your ‘neediness’. Also, try to understand and forgive your parents for the family atmosphere as they are living in the only way they know how to live. This will free you of the inner unrest that you are experiencing, and keep you in the right ‘space’ to welcome a companion in your life. Don’t be in a hurry. Wait for the one who likes you for who you are.
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