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Get in the game

Thursday, October 27, 2016

Do you often complain about your partner’s video game habits — that they spend more time with the latest game than they do with you? Jagruti Verma tells you about a few things that may make dating a gamer easier

While we don’t doubt your partner’s affection for you, we also understand that sometimes you could feel like you’re playing second fiddle to his console. Perhaps what you need to understand is that no game can ever compete with you. All you need to do is keep a few things in mind and realise that playing video games is a part of his life you could share with him!

Plan your dates well
If your partner has a schedule when it comes to playing video games (alone or with friends), don’t interrupt it whenever you feel like you deserve more attention. Respect his time and priorities. Would you want your shopping outings with your girlfriends rescheduled?

Multi-tasking is difficult
Don’t talk to them when they are trying to get through the next checkpoint, scoring a goal or eliminating the evil forces trying to take over the world. Let them concentrate on the task at hand and later they can listen to you in peace. Having half his attention works for neither party.

Appreciate their choices
He might like a T-shirt that has his favourite gaming character on it instead of the one you chose from the latest collection of your favourite brand. Respect his choice; it doesn’t mean he likes you any less.

Don’t pretend
Join in if you like playing video games, but you don’t have to pretend that you like playing them to spend time with him. Give the games he plays a try, but if you don’t like them, try to find one that both of you enjoy. If you try hard enough, you’ll find something, even if it’s a childhood favourite!

No help please
Don’t be a backseat driver. Seriously. One of the most annoying things in the world is trying to play a game with someone telling you that you’re doing it wrong. Are they going to fall off a cliff? Do they need to watch out for the zombie around the corner? Let them break their high scores on their own!

Expensive but necessary
Sure, you don’t understand why they need to spend all that money on the latest game when they could take you to dinner instead. But, do you think they understand your `6,000 shoes? If they’re going overboard, you could give them a light reality check if finances are tight. But, and this is especially important if you’re not married, don’t control what they’re spending their own money on!

Time flies
No, they don’t mean five minutes when they say five minutes and yes, you will have to get used to that. One mission will turn into three and you will be tempted to pull the plug out of the mains in a bid to bring them back to reality. If they’re really spending every waking moment in front of a console, consider it. Otherwise, leave them alone until it’s time for them to step out of the dungeon.

It’s not as casual as you think
Video gaming is pretty emotional. No, really. You may laugh it off as a silly game, but most games are more challenging than they appear to be and a lot of them require real skill to get through. If your partner looks troubled and is deeply immersed, chances are it’s because he really is! Only try to ‘help’ shake them out of it if you think they’re using it as an escape or an excuse not to face life. If they’ve got their career on track and still notice you’re in the room from time to time, they’re doing okay.

Take advantage of the hobby
You know what the best thing about being the girlfriend of a gamer is? You pretty much always know what to give them — a limited edition of their favourite game, a new gadget for the console, the latest pack for the biggest game of the year, an extension on a classic. The possibilities are endless! Forget shirts and socks, these are gifts he will really appreciate.

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I am a 31-year-old married man. I have a very goo
Dr. Rajan B. Bhonsle, M.D. (Bom)
Consulting Sex Therapist & Counsellor
Dr. (Mrs.) Minnu R. Bhonsle, Ph.D.
Consulting Psychotherapist & Counsellor
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Aries (Mar 21 - Apr 20)You will be in demand in your work and profession Try to maintain cordial relations with all, for you never know when you may need them. Where money is concerned be practical and check the background of persons you may have to deal with. You will fulfill responsibilities to loved ones but will need time and space for yourself. Your mate will make sure you get the time.
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