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Dear Grace, I Have A Problem...

Thursday, February 18, 2016

Dear Grace,
I’ve been in a serious relationship for over six months, which is going great — and we have amazing chemistry. Everything was fine, until he gave me a promise ring! I was taken aback, but I managed to accept it without sounding hesitant. I know it’s only a promise ring, but I think it’s too early for things lke that! Should I just go with it, or should I confront him? Please help!
  — Anaita Kapur, Marine Lines
Dear Anaita,

It is okay to feel as though things are moving too fast. While it’s too early for a long-term commitment, a promise ring won’t change anything between the both of you. It could also mean that he is serious and wants to move things to the next level someday, if not immediately. However, if you are still uncomfortable with the idea of this kind of commitment early on,  you should talk to your boyfriend and tell him what’s on your mind. Convey your message calmly and try not to give him the idea that you’re not looking for commitment at all. It is important to be on the same page with your partner, so to avoid any further complications, keep the channels of communication open.

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I am a robust, healthy man in my early thirties.
Dr. Rajan B. Bhonsle, M.D. (Bom)
Consulting Sex Therapist & Counsellor
Dr. (Mrs.) Minnu R. Bhonsle, Ph.D.
Consulting Psychotherapist & Counsellor
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