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Heart To Heart

Monday, October 01, 2018

PC muscles
I have been hearing a lot about PC muscles exercise enhancing sexual pleasure for women. What are PC muscles? How does one do the PC muscles exercise?

PC muscles stand for the Pubo-Coccygeus or Pubo-Coccygeal muscle group. This muscle group runs from the pubic bone in front to the tailbone in the rear and supports the pelvic floor. In women, this is the muscle that contracts during orgasm and gives the vagina a feeling of tightness. In men, this is the muscle that contracts when ejaculation takes place. A strong PC muscle contributes to your pleasure in sex in many ways. If you exercise it daily, you will build the muscle mass in the pelvic area, which will increase the amount of blood flowing to your genitals and allow for more pleasurable sensations during arousal. In addition, strong PC muscles can tighten the vagina and make intercourse, orgasm and ejaculation more enjoyable. An added benefit is that strong PC muscles often prevent bladder and prostate problems. In fact, correcting bladder problems in pregnant women was how this muscle was first discovered.

To exercise PC muscles, you must first learn to identify them. To find these muscles, stop and start the flow of urine while urinating. The muscles that tighten as you do this are the PC muscles. To exercise the muscles, contract them for a count of five, and then relax. Start with six repetitions, and then gradually build up to twenty-five repetitions over three months. Initially, holding the contraction for five seconds could be difficult, but like every muscle in our body, the more you exercise, the stronger they will become. It takes about three weeks of daily exercise for your PC muscles to get in shape.

Once they are in shape, you should still exercise every day to keep them strong, and enjoy the benefits. For many women, Kegel exercises have the additional benefit of improving the quality of orgasms, making them more intense and even more frequent.

Experimenting with different positions
My wife and I have experimented with different positions during sex, and it is important to me that she receives maximum pleasure from our times of intimacy. Is there one position that provides the best stimulation for women?

The process of sexually enjoying with one another is not rigid and stagnant, but continually changing and flowing. Thus it is good to know that you are trying out different positions. It appears as if you have the choice and freedom to experiment and enjoy with each other, but you are more keen to maximize enjoyment for your wife.

Finally, your wife is the best authority on what is most gratifying for her. You can initiate by gently practicing some more experimentation to collect data about what makes her experience maximum pleasure. After discovering the same, you can add those elements to your love making to maximize the enjoyment during intimacy.

Conventionally, the man-on-top position is assumed during intercourse. However, this might not result in the correct stimulation of the clitoris (pleasure point) of the woman. However, in the female-superior position, she can adjust the angle of her body and the position of her legs to get the maximum stimulation.

If your wife wishes to achieve orgasm during intercourse, experimenting with different positions will help you to enhance that possibility, providing that the goal does not distract both of you from the pleasure of enjoying each other's bodies.

It is very important for both of you to develop an attitude of openness that is mutually comfortable. Strictly avoid insisting with your wife to try newer positions to enhance her pleasure. If she is satisfied, let her be the authority on what she needs and wants for her own sexual pleasure.

Life after marriage
I am 22-year-old girl. I will be getting married in one-month time. It is going to be an arranged marriage. My friends tell me that your life changes completely after marriage. Is it true? This unknown, impending change makes me very anxious and nervous. Please help.

Yes, life does change after marriage and it should. Before marriage one lives only for oneself, but with the marriage vows one commences on a beautiful journey of caring and sharing, expanding one’s heart to include someone other than oneself. Change is not to be shied away from. Change means getting out of your comfort zone and living your life in the best possible way. It is the way of personal growth and thus extremely life-positive.

Status and relationship
I met a girl last year in June when I joined my computer institute. Actually she is the younger sister of the counselor of that institute and at that time I had a little chat with her. And I really liked the confidence and her charming nature and I got attracted to her but could not tell her since our class timings were different and I didn’t have time to come during her timing. So that’s why I somehow got her mail id and told her everything about what I feel about her...and she accepted my friendship and replied to all my mails....but now her course is complete and she no more comes to institute... Well rite now she is out of station and will come may be in February... and I want to know how to deal with her as her status is far better than mine and she is so confident and I really don’t know when she will come in front of me then how should I react...please doctor help me by telling that how should I react and what gift should I give to her when she will return to Mumbai..

I have no inkling of your age, but since you mention the computer institute, I presume that you are in the career-building phase of your life. You have also mentioned the difference in status. As far as having a friendship is concerned there seems to be no real problem as she has so far been responding positively to all your friendly overtures via email. However, if you are thinking of a more seriously involved long-term relationship then you need to focus on career-building very seriously. Remember, every relationship brings responsibilities with it. Your difference in status is very real and though money does not buy happiness, it is definitely a necessity in the real world. Therefore, you can continue your friendship but start including your career plans in your conversations. Let her see that you are a responsible and mature person who understands the responsibilities of life. If she has a liking for you, then such meaningful and responsible conversations could warm her up to the possibility of a long-term relationship with you in spite of the current difference in status.

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